96: The Goodbye Letter

posted in: Season 6: Nowhere To Hide | 12

“The question of leaving Amsterdam because of Chigbo is not an option, you are not going anywhere. I will go and find out where he lives; then we can go and talk to him. I understand he is angry due to the way he was deported back to Lagos. He said he spent more than two years before returning here and that he spent more than 800,000 Naira which he wants you to pay him back” Robin said after trying to calm me down.

“Robinson, i know he must have suffered in Lagos before returning here but Lagos is in his Country. Everybody will not live in Europe. If his intention of returning here was or is to come after me, trust me he will return to Lagos very soon. The reason why i came down to talk to you about this is because of the girls. If i happened to be alone here in Bijlmer like i was when the first incident occurred, i wouldn’t be here disturbing you about this. I am not against you visiting Chigbo but I am not going with you and when you get there, make sure you remind him that i have not changed much from what i used to be” i said and got up.

“Where are you going? It is night” Robin said as i walked towards the exit door.

I told him that i was going to buy something outside.

I got outside our apartment and walked to the front of the mosque; then i stopped a Snoda and asked him to take me to the Central Station.

There was a coffee shop called “The Point’ where i used to buy Marijuana.
I located the shop and entered.
The Dutch-Ghanaian man who managed the shop recognized me immediately.

“Hey my man, where have you been all along?” he said to me in a Rastafari slang.

“Prison, I need three grams of Skunk and three grams of white widow” I said.
He measured them out and gave them to me.

I rolled one joint and smoked there while i waited for the two people inside the shop to leave.

When the two men left, i returned to the counter and said to the Ghanaian, “I need a gun to protect myself, some Suriname guys are after me. I met them in prison and we fought twice in there. They are out now and i heard they want me dead” I said.

After trying to talk me out of getting a gun, he promised to meet his friend who will get me a gun in one or two days.
I thanked him and left.

I had a friend who rented me a gun when i initially lived in Amsterdam; Ricardo. However, i misplaced his phone number. He was the one who could have given me a gun easily.

It was almost 12am when i returned to our apartment. Maria had called but i had intentionally left my phone in the apartment before i went to buy the weed.

“I was worried, why didn’t you tell me you were going out?” Maria said as soon as i got into the room.

I didn’t answer her, i just kept quiet.

“Is everything OK baby?” She asked again.

“Why are you not sleeping?” I said.

“I am telling you why i am not sleeping and you are asking why i am still awake” she shouted.

I looked at her angrily and walked down to the sitting room.
I rolled a joint and smoked until i got tired and sleepy, then i crashed into the long sofa and slept.

The small noises from the rooms overhead Woke me up around 6am.

It was a Sunday and Robin, together with the girls were preparing to go to the African House where the Catholic Church was located.

As soon as i stood up, i rolled another joint and smoked while i washed it down with Hennessy.

Nobody cared to ask if i wanted to go to Church. They just prepared and walked past me to the exit door.
They knew i was angry with something or somebody and Maria personally knew it was a bad time to say anything to me.

The piece of paper i wrote the phone number of the Ghanaian phone number was lying on the table opposite me. I grabbed it and walked upstairs to get my phone.

A piece of paper was lying on the bed, it was deliberately left there for me to see.

I picked it up and opened it.
It was a note written by Maria to me. It covered two pages and was written with a poor handwriting but the words were clear enough to read.

“I cried the whole night while thinking about my life. I can still remember how it all started in Lekki Beach Lagos that afternoon. If i had known that we will end up this way, i might not have given you my phone number. I refused to blame myself because i had numerous chances to quit this relationship but something about you always stops me from even thinking about it. Maybe it is the love i have for you. I knew every man will always change but i didn’t know that you could just abandon me upstairs to sleep in the sitting room simply because i asked you where you went in the middle of the night. I am going to the Church with my documents and my money. I will leave Holland and go anywhere from the Church. If our path meet again, i will embrace you like never before but please be careful, it seems you have enemies here. The last thing wish to hear is that someone hurt you but then sometimes i wonder if you can even get hurt by anything.. Your Sweetheart Maria”

After reading the letter three times without having the capability to analyse it properly, i rushed into the bathroom and took a quick bath.
I was under the heavy influence of Marijuana and Hennessy which made critical thinking very difficult.
The only thing i felt i should do was to go to the Church and bring her back. Then we can sit down and analyse the letter together.

If she really wanted to leave me, she should not have given me hints that she was running away. She really wanted to know if i still loved and wanted her and since i did, the best thing to do was to go to the Church.

I changed the clothes i had and took a Snoda to the Church.

The African House was the only Catholic Church in Bijlmer and since Igbos were predominantly Catholics, i was likely going to run into some Familiar faces.

I got to the Church and went in through the front door near the Alter where the Reverend Father was preaching about how God loved us and how He will never hurt us.
As i walked down the Isle and searched for Maria, i wondered if the Reverend Liar was talking about another God or the one that burnt down Sodom and Gomorrah, The one that Flooded the entire Earth with water and saved few people and animals. Was i being delusional or was my own Bible different?

Hundreds of eyes watched as i walked down the Isle until i found where Maria, Precious and Robin seated in the middle of the Church; then i went in front of Maria and held her hand to help her stand up.
Heads turned as i walked with her through the back door to the outside of the Church.

“I am sorry” I said as i removed my dark eye glasses to reveal some tears in my eyes.

I was really Sorry for everything that happened to Maria since She met me.

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12 Responses

  1. Ebiet_vicky

    Nice of u zuby. Maria really loves u even if u were a runner!!! Fire on am learning a lot 4rm u boss

  2. Dejust

    repent ooo repent

    Let d love of ur woman satisfy u

    zubby, timing and good finishing is everything

    not every fight u must won, check d cost of ur victory, lost of ur armies and fears of ur chiefs

    sometimes it is good to surrender!!!!!

  3. Quinine

    Hmmm, so romantic. U are realy given her d asurance that u love her as much as she loves u.

  4. Aao

    Lol@reverend liar. Chai, chai diaris god o. Seems u really loves Maria then. Wow. Things we do for love. I go love ooooooooooooooooo

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