‘Who stole some things in our bag?’ were the words i heard from jss2a class.
‘So this seniors no even know me sef’ i thought and smiled
Finally they entered into our class and the sight of five john cena muscles seniors wiped every trace of smile on my lips.
‘Who was the miscreant that stole our properties?’ the tallest senior questioned.
I was now wondering when book, biros and mangoes became properties but i dared not say it.
‘I said who took our properties from our bags?’ the thunder voice jolted me from my thoughts.
‘Senior which kind property be th..’ a slap was handed down to the student before he finished talking.
‘So all of you are refusing to talk abi, ok watch and see’.
What he brought out from his pocket made us jolt with horror, it was a stick-like stuff tied with red and black cloth with a chicken feather tied on top.
‘Senior i wan go piss’ i shouted with my legs shaking and my teeth gritting.
‘Sit down there my friend before i break your blokus’ another macho senior shouted.
‘Una see this juju una go swear and if na you carry am you go turn to goat now now’ the senior threatened.
I had never sworn in my life because my dad told us it was not good so i felt like disappearing because i would still turn to a goat that day or so i tot.
‘Senior please na, no be us’ students cried from different corners of the classroom.
‘Sharap my friend, do we look like we are joking’ the seniors threatened.
I sat like a prisoner of war waiting to be sentenced.
‘Starting from here, you start hold this thing and say, if na me steal una thing, make i turn to goat’ a senior said while giving to the boy.
I had to think fast in order to prevent turning into a goat but my head was empty of ideas. Finally i got to my turn and i was as pale as a dead man.
‘oya its your turn, take this thing and swear’
‘Why you no sabi swear’
‘Na because my father na pastor’
‘Ow so pastor pikin no dey steal abi’
‘Yes i don baptise, i be born again’
‘Tunde, no be this boy been fall from tree that day’ the most quiet senior touch another of his friend.
‘Na true o, see im eye wey bee bite am’ tunde replied back.
Before i could say c.ronaldo a stinging slap sounded on my face that increased its velocity.
‘So you were the one that packed our biros and mangoes…and even my test book’ one of them added a lie that made me defend myself.
‘Senior na me plug that mango na and i no carry any body textbook’ Another slap landed on my temple before i could finish.
I was partially deaf and blind and i lost control of my speech except the crying aspect.
‘When we are through with you, your father would not know you again’
They took me by the ear(maybe thats why my ear big sha) and dragged be to their class.
‘Stop there’ a voice i had already saved in my brain memory card froze us all and i was dropped like a bag of egushi on the ground.
‘What is the problem?’ aunty PHE came to my side with a long menacing koboko.
‘Ma..em..he em stole our..our..things’ the macho senior had suddenly turned into an in
‘So na so this woman dey make senior fear sef’ i thought with a little confidence budding in me.
‘How did he steal your things and how did you catch him?’
That did the trick because all the senior where fidgeting in fear while i layed on the ground smiling like a christmas chicken.
‘Am talking to you guys’
Non of them could answer until she saw the red stuff hanging out of one of the senior’s pocket and she took it out.
‘So tell me which of you father is a native doctor’ she said angrily, by then i was laughing like jerry the mouse in my mind while sitting on comfortable first class mattras(grass and sand) and watching the show.
All of them stood like status and pointing each other to first talk, finally one got a little courage and spoke.
‘Ma its not a charm, we only brought it to act drama, actually its a corn cob we wrapped’
That statement pricked me in my mind and i was enraged and spoke the words that nail my coffin.
‘Aunty na lie, them say make we swear if not we go turn to goat’
Everyone looked at me that moment and one of the senior kick me hard which made me scream.
‘So you seniors are terrorising students with corn wrapped charm, oya go and grab those cutlasses and clear the football field.
Just when i started singing ‘it is well with my soul’ in my mind, aunty PHE faced me.
‘And you did you finish the punishment i gave you yestaday’
‘Em aunty..i..i..’ i had also caught stammering disease. I was pursuing those students, i finally said.
‘don’t em and i me, before i close my eye and open it, i want to see you with broom sweeping the classes’ she said. And when you are through i want to see you.
I did not hesitate i quickly jumped up and wanted to run when she added another koboko lash to conclude my beatings for that day.
‘If i enter ss2 and i no wicked eh, make i know wetin cause am’ i thought while running and scratching my arse
‘No be till when you see me after school you go catch me’
I finished sweeping the whole classes and the seniors that were punished asked me to come and pack the grasses they had cut, i refused and ran away because i concluded in my mind that it was better to face aunty PHE than to meet those seniors.
I went to aunty PHE place but i took solomon with me to avoid stories that touch
When we got there, she was alone marking some class work.
“ma. Am here”
she looked at me with a smile on her face but when she saw solomon the useless smile on her face disappeared.
“why are both of you here” she gave a jamb question
“ma. My father told me to go and buy something with him after school” i fired her a jamb answer.
She was disappointed and i said in my mind ‘so this woman think say i no get sense’.
Since that day she did not disturb me again.
Since that day that my balls was nearly broken while playing football in primary school, i’ve always had reservation about playing football in school because i wanted to see my children.
So that day i intended strolling around with my elder sister and her friends even though i was afraid of girls then, i still loved listening to their stories about boyfriends etc.
But those seniors were not helping matters, they dragged me to the field to join my mates in playing football.
I got to the field and the next thing i knew i was already on the ground.
‘Una see person never enter ball you wan kill me already’ i queried.
The match started and my mates were winning 3goals to 1, what i did not know or bother to ask was were my goal post was, i just ran anywhere the ball was and pass to anybody.
Suddenly a boy was running with the ball to a goal post, i ran like an antelope and pursued him, he shot at the goal keeper, the goalie punched the ball to my direction and i added another heavy shot before i realised i had scored an own goal.
I was driven from the match and i looked at the seniors and said i told you.
I met some of my mates who were older than me and they were the kinda guys that smoke indian hemp and always toast girls during games, the brought a bike to games and they asked me if i knew how to ride bike i shouted yes.
I taught that riding a bike was like riding tyre so i climbed the bike, what i saw made me almost jump down and run for my life, that was the first time i had sat at the front of a bike and i was so scared.
‘So you sef na jew man’ they all laughed at me when i could not even turn the head of the bike, not to talk of starting it.
They pushed me to the fuel tank and three of them climbed together with me, i felt like a rat in a small hole.
They started the bike and started moving on a high speed, the rush of breeze hit my face like a volcano and made me started crying.
When we were speeding i saw a pothole in the ground which made me afraid thinking i was going into the ground, i started shouting, ‘Blood of Jesus’ and closed my eye but the bike kept on going and i was hearing laughter then i opened my eyes and saw that we were not dead.
‘Bros na so you sabi fear’ they said with laughter.
‘no i just dey practised how to pray’ i said with my heart beating wildly which made them laughed the more.
I quickly begged them to drop me and they did and left.
‘Una no go come collect number’ i shouted to them but they cared less.
I went back to the school to meet a wrestling match going on so i ran to go and cheer them up.
The fight was between the games master and an ex-student. The student was toasting a girl and the games master thinking the boy was a junior student ran up to him and flog him, telling him to go and join his mate in games.
The boy was furious and gave the teacher an outstanding blow that could send john cena to an untimely death. He then grabbed the man and raised him up like a sack of garri and flung him to the ground while punching the hell out of him.
The students were happy because the game master was a thorn to our flesh and no-one dared help him, until i saw blood coming out of his mouth and so it irritated me and i grabbed a stone and flung it on the ex-student head.
Everyone were surprise at my actions and the boy got up from the teacher’s body and flung himself at me, but this time i had furnished myself with the art of war learning from my different fights, so as the boy rushed at me i turned my hand like Bruce Lee and sent another stone crashing into his kneecap.
That slowed him down while other seniors and the game master grabbed him from behind and bundled him to the ground.
I had become an overnight hero who scored an own goal and the rate girls were looking at me with admiration i felt like GEJ
the boy was later taken to the police station while i was the current celebrity who everybody wanted escorting home so that they can hear the story live from the chairman’s mouth, i added my own share of the scope and made my part sweeter.
I did not know my actions had bought me more enemies than friends.