” Schon Gebostag” (happy birthday), the fat lady said.
I kept quiet for a while before I recalled that it was my birthday. A fake birthday. I had met the lady at the entrance of the shopping mall in the morning and while we were chatting, I had lied to her that it was my birthday. I had also told her that I was going to stay all day at the park.
*alert alert*

*What was she doing out here on the park alone?. It was getting to evening. Could it be because I told her I was going to be at the park?. It was left for me to found out*

I smiled and nodded at her while saying ”danke” at the same time.
She was sitting on a wooden chair fixed on the ground. It was an isolated Area, about 100metres from the major route in the park.
I sat down beside her and we got talking.
Her name was Irene. Her forefathers had migrated from Czech Republic in the early 1900s. There were farmers, but mostly dealing on cattles. She pointed to a direction across the lake and said their settlement was over there. It was a ten minutes walk.
On my part, since I was obligated to make some kind of introductions as well,
I was Solomon Ebot from Cameroun but I had a different story of how and why I came to Germany.
This time, my father was a key political figure in Cameroun. The Paul Biya led government were about to murder our family before we got the news and fled to Europe.

*I bet she didn’t know who Biya was but that was her problem*

When we ran out of things to talk about, she offered to show me around their farm settlement and I agreed.
I followed her around the lake in the park and some minutes later, we got to the farm. It was sitting on a large Area of land, fenced with metal poles and barbed wires. Cows were grazing in the out field. Trees of apples were seen standing at intervals of about 20 metres.
A one story cabin house was at the north end of the settlement. We headed to the cabin. It was a nice house. The dog growled at me as we approached. Irene said something and it kept quiet. We got to the sitting room where she motioned me to take a seat. A picture of a man holding a riffle gun hung on the wall of the sitting room.

An old woman got out and looked at me curiously. She said something to me in German or Czech but I couldn’t figure out what it was, so I nodded like a lizard and kept quiet. She went back inside and came out with a baseball bat. She was staggering towards me with her tired eyes fixed on me. I stood up, ready to bolt out through the door before she hit me with the bat.

It was when she heard Irene’s voice inside coming out of the kitchen that she knew I was not a burglar.

Irene brought two cups of black coffee. We sat down and drank for some minutes and when we finished, I asked her to show me around the farm instead of sitting in one place.
We walked past some trees and got to the shelter where the cows sleep during the snow or winter. There was a separate shelter which was a kind of store where some equipments were kept.

” Are you married in Africa” Irene asked out of nowhere.
” No, why” I said pretending not to be surprised by the sudden question.

She said she was looking for a boyfriend and that she liked Africans. According to her, she had dated one African from the camp before but the guy left when he was posted and never came back there.

*”why would anybody come back to this cow dump” I said in Abiriba and smiled *
She smiled too.
I told her that every black man was not the same and that one day, she would find someone who would like to stay with her.

Her father had died two years before, leaving the farm for her and her grand mom.
Her mother lived in Berlin and cared nothing about the farm.

*Ironically, it was a perfect opportunity for me or any camper to start work, even eventually get married to this lonely lady and possibly inherit the farm but there was some complications.
First when you got posted out of the city, the Germans never expect you to come back there. If they see you there, you will be paying some ‘straffe’ (penalty or punishment’.)
Secondly, this lady was fat and I don’t really date fat women.
Finally, I had always loved to live in the heart of the capital cities (a trait that took me to Paris, Amsterdam, Lisbon, Vienna, Bratislava, Stockholm, Madrid and Roma) not some East German border town of less than 10,000 inhabitants. No way.*

We chatted some more and when we got inside the store room, the elephant grabbed my shirt and started a kiss.

*I nearly jumped off and ran away but I decided to see the outcome*

I feigned surprise initially but when the kiss tasted good, I responded. We kissed for less than a minute before her hand grabbed my JT.

*take it easy bulldog, no wonder there was no man in your life*

There was no pleasure whatsoever coming from her but I had a pre-made smile for every situation.
Some minutes later, my jean had been pulled down to my ankles, my JT had been covered with a condom and her gown had been raised while she was bent down holding the edges of a chair.
I humped in from behind, struggling to get hold of her big round waist. Surprisingly, this big lady moved her ar.se in and out with such a fast pace.
I even started to enjoy the ride. I fvcked her for several minutes but due to the fact that I had switched off my mind from the event, it was difficult to release.
When she got tired of fvcking, I sat on the chair and asked her to sit on top of my JT with her cunnt. She did and continued moving side ways. It was a better position since the entire length of my Joystick entered inside her.
We later climaxed together and wore our clothes. I wrapped the used condom and slipped it into my pocket. We left and went back to the cabin. She made more black coffee, no sugar and no milk.
When we finished drinking, she walked me back to the park and we parted ways after collecting her phone number.
I promised to come again as soon as possible, a promise I knew I was not going to fulfil.

When I got back to the camp, there was a fight.
A new lady had arrived in camp, two Nigerians had been arguing who should date her. Somehow, the argument had escalated into a fight.
When they finished telling me the story, I asked where the girl was. Someone pointed me to her direction, I thanked him and zoomed off to meet Adaeze.
A Nigerian girl had finally showed up in Eisenhuttenstadt asylum Camp. Allelujah…

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